SANTA GIFTS - Tip #2

It's important to remember that Christmas time is a great opportunity to teach your children about provident living, the difference between wants and needs and gratitude.  My ideas here are supported by many psychologists and family therapists and I will share some of their advice as well. 

We should never let guilt or comparison with friends or neighbors fuel our gift purchasing and giving.  Set a limit in your family about how many gifts will be from Santa and when you discuss with your children what they want for Christmas tell them your expectations for the year.  For instance, if it's going to be a very frugal Christmas let them know that Santa will not be bringing all their wants this year but he could probably bring one or two. 

I have taught preschool for 21 years and each year we do a Sub-for-Santa in our class and collect change for over a month and then take that jar filled with $ to the bank and then go to the store to purchase gifts for needy children in their age range. Every year after explaining what we are collecting the $ for and how the parents of these children don't have enough $ to buy the things their children need and want, the children will say,"Santa will just bring them the presents they want." 

I have come to the conclusion that children need to understand that Santa cannot bring anything and everything.  Children need to learn about realistic expectations.  So I came up with this explanation for children and it seems to really open their eyes to their opportunity to help others and also that they are not entitled to whatever they want and have to really think about what they hope to receive from him.  It is this...

Santa also lives on a budget that is given to him by the parents.  I have told my children that parents have to give Santa money for the gifts he brings.  He gets much of his things from the same stores we shop at because they give him the best deals.  He also has a deal with stores that if something breaks after Christmas you can exchange or return it to a nearby store.  He  has to check with parents before giving the gifts he gives.  There is a special phone number that only parents can use to call him.  This works great if your child is begging for a puppy and you just cannot have one right now.  

One of the best ways to blow your Santa cover is to give clothing or shoes.  It is difficult to believe that Santa is making clothes, shoes or socks up in the North Pole.  Things that could have "fit" problems should be given from the parents.  As a child, the first time I started to clue in to the Santa thing was when I opened some boots and immediately put them on and my mom said, "If they don't fit we can take them back."  How? Where? I wondered.

In our family Santa only ever brings two or three gifts.  The rest of the gifts are put under the tree before Christmas Eve so they are seen and anticipated about before the big day (if they are put out on Christmas Eve children we be very suspicious on Christmas morning).  I also want my children to understand that it takes a lot of effort for parents to shop and wrap and show appreciation for that Christmas morning.  I think it would be great for children to write a letter of thanks to Santa after Christmas to practice showing gratitude. 

Lastly, there is much research that backs up that as children grow and are asked what they remember best about Christmas, traditions and memories far outweigh any specific gift that was given.  This is powerful research.  We need to spend more time on building traditions that are special to Christmas in our family and less time running around like crazy people trying to buy the latest and greatest toys.  Traditions create memories and that is what are children truly remember and what create the strong bonds that last a lifetime.

IDEA:
12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS STORIES:  Here's a fun tradition that you could start DEC 12 or 13.  Wrap up all the Christmas books you have or if you are just starting out accumulating books, buy one or two each year until you have 12 and in the meantime check out 12 from the library.  Each night have your children open 1 book.  Sit and read it together.  You will open one each night until Christmas.   We always end on Christmas Eve with this family favorite Jolly Old Santa Claus by Ideal Press.  I've been reading that on Christmas Eve since I was a little girl.  It has the BEST illustrations by George Hinke and puts you right at the North Pole and you can go to bed with visions of Christmas magic right in your head!